If I lived in a castle made of money, I would also be wearing this Chloe dress. It is cute and pretty and will cost you £485 if you so desire it – and if you’ve recently gone insane within walking distance of Harvey Nics and need to max out the last roof-space on eight credit cards. This could happen: you need to have a plan. Plan for this. At least you’d have a great dress.
In the real world, there is this excellent t-shirt (it could have been made for me) which is a slightly less scary £22.99 (www.seibei.com). Behold the vast abyss between my imaginary life of champagne cocktails and eternal summer (above) and my actual life of watching Don’t Tell The Bride in my ‘lounge wear’ (below).
Amy Jardine 